Munson – “Trust me honey, you’re not his type.”
Claudia – “Oh I’m his type, I’m everyones type.” Kingpin.
It’s that time of the week again where I have to explain to the misses why I’m leaving laudatory comments on girls Instagram feeds and why they’re sending me selfies in their bathrobes. Ok so maybe I shouldn’t be saving them as wallpaper on my desktop, or having them printed and framed above the bed, but like Al Pacino said to his misses in Heat “When we hooked up baby, I told you, you would have to share me with all the models, the pageant queens, the Brazil women’s national volleyball team,..” something like that. Anyway, enough from me. Here with their consent and in no discernible order are the Top 6 Redheads to Follow on Instagram.
From out of Chicago, comes Madeline Ford. Can you believe that Trip Advisor doesn’t mention this girl once in the Top Ten Things to see in Chicago? Come on Trip Advisor, enough already with the Lincoln Zoo and the Field Museum. Here’s my plan Chicago to boost tourism for your city. Have Madeline work in customs at departures at the O’Hare International Airport and just when she’s handing dudes back their boarding passes have her say, with a wink and a smile, “See you soon stud.” The guy will do two things, rub one out on the plane home (otherwise known as joining the Solo Mile High Club) and when he lands, he’ll be on the first flight back to Chicago.
“Come on honey, we’re going back to Chicago.”
“What do you mean? We just got back from Chicago? Are you ok? You were in that bathroom for a longtime honey and you’re all sweaty, are you coming down with something?”
“Look I errr … left my errr .. you know I left my … you know something, we never went to Lincoln Zoo and … tell you what I have a better idea. I’ll go back alone, check out the Zoo, tick that off the list and I’ll be back in a couple of months, ok honey?”
From Montreal Canada, comes Miguelle. When I chatted up – I mean, when I approached Miguelle for the feature she told me that she only had selfies and had never done professional photography before. I found that so far-fetched I called her a liar and demanded that she forward me the entire contents of her hard drive! Of course I jest. I showed her profile to housemate Neil and we couldn’t believe she hasn’t had a professional shoot done. We talked about it some more in the pub later, long into the morning. The next day over breakfast we cracked open some tinnies and googled how much a plane ticket was to Montreal. For Neil of course.
If you’re into your feet, corsets and redheads, then you’ve won the god damn lottery because Ginger Straps profile is all about the above. Well, I guess the fiancee of Ginger Straps has won the lottery, this is more like Jim Bowen showing you the speed boat you could have won in Bullseye. I hope that analogy works. Also I just thought, why is it that guys are into feet and all women are repelled by them? And should guys trim their knuckle hair like they do their eyebrows and chest? Send us a comment. Where do you stand on feet issues? (Pun intended).
Tess was crowned Miss World Australia in 2015. Tess just looks a picture of health. I wouldn’t be surprised if all she ate were avocados on rye bread for breakfast, lunch and dinner. She also looks like one of those models you’d see on the wall at your local hairdressers, only you’d never see any models in that hairdressers. Instead you’d have a sturdy girl called Sheila in there that cut your hair whilst smoking a cigarette.
GREAT DANE BATMAN! Karina Harry everybody. Surely Denmark’s finest export, right up there with Carlsberg and Mads Mikkelson. I imagine if Karina and I were trapped in a lift together she’d have to endure hours of me talking about Mads Mikkelson’s fantastic performance as Le Chiffre in Casino Royale. She might not even know who Mads Mikkelson is, but that wouldn’t stop this lifestyle journalist, until that day Karina…until that Day. Karina is an alternative model and her profile leans toward a vintage style, with a mix of underwear shoots and the great outdoors.
Lastly but by no means leastly Lana Dega, 22. The reason I put the age in hers and not the others is because she looks 12 in that picture and is holding a teddy bear between her legs. I actually think Lana’s profile is pretty cool, and no ones getting paid for this so you know I’m telling the truth. Originally from Moscow, she does that cool spacing thing between her pictures. I should really figure out how to do that on mine. Mine looks like someone just emptied a load of jigsaw pieces on the table, pushed them together and then left the room to find something better to do.