Breakfast of champions

Last month the missus and I once again descended to lovers capital, Paris. Depending on the season you can expect to pay between 90-160 sheets a night for a double at the Hotel Du Lys. It’s ratedĀ #1,395 of 1,803 Hotels in ParisĀ on Trip Advisor. Firstly, I want to get a few things off my chest before I get into the review.


You’re job is to get my ass checked-in, and in my room in the quickest time possible. I’ll forgive you for having a 1000 yard stare, a shitty attitude and smelling of god damn cigarettes, just fast track me to my room.

I will not forgive you picking up the god damn phone half way through our check-in, I don’t care if it’s Macron calling from the Presidential suite asking for you to come and personally fluff his pillows. Jesus Christ.

He’s probably the only one here,” the missus says feelingly. Making exceptions.

So are we!” I shoot back. I unholster my palm and aim for the desk bell under the receptionists nose.

Don’t you dare,” the missus fires.


Surface area in hotel rooms = Win

I like surface area. This hotel room on the bottom floor is an after thought, no doubt it was a store cupboard of sorts before they carved it into this mouse trap. That said, the room has plenty of surface area. A desk, shelfs. We’re all good for surface areas.

Hangers – God damn what are we doing with hangers? Is it a societal thing that people steal hangers along with the other amenities? Ok so the missus will help herself to a couple of bottles of body wash, but we’re not f*cking animals. We’re not going to schlepp all the way back to London with your flimsy hangers. How about some trust. I’d rather have a god damn cavity search when I leave the hotel than have to suffer these bastard things.


Urrrgghh societies scourge

Some history

The Hotel Du Lys is actually an old mansion built back in the 17th Century. It’s situated very close to the subway Michel, a stones throw from Sienne and there are some great restaurants on Rue Guisarde. Don’t eat on the street nearby unless its crepes. The service at La Boussole (5-10 minute walk) is pedestrian but the food was top draw.


Chin up Pedro

Ok I might have been a bit sniffy about Hotel Du Lys at the start, but I’d actually come back here. It’s quiet, very central, bed is good, pillows respectable. Just need to upgrade the hangers, get someone on the desk who’s not tuned out, and we’re away.

Can you recommend somewhere to stay in Paris? Would you like me to come and review your hotel? Am I a being complete arse to the Hotel Du Lys? Leave a comment in the box below. Click on any image to take you my Facebook page.


Checking in – make sure you bring something to read




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