torre del mangia siena

Up the Torre del Mangia tower in Siena

Drinking alcohol on holiday is the Great British past time.

You might have thought that your recent summer holiday was the best, but how much of it can you actually remember? 

Have you recently given up alcohol and are now dreading the holiday without it? 

Are you now wondering what to do on the weekends during StopTober? 

Has your wife recently lost both her legs and arms in a tragic climbing accident and you’re wondering who’s going to make your dinner now?

OK ignore the last one, I just wanted to get your attention. Below are 5 killer tricks on how not to drink on holiday.

alcohol advice holiday

woman holiday brickwork pienza

Love this brick work – Pienza

Take a 1000 pictures

Without the alcohol in your system you’ll need to replace that past time with a more productive one. It’s hard to hold a pint of Stella if you’ve got a camera in your hand. Bit like doing the washing up after dinner will stop you having that post-meal cigarette.

I’ve recently got into taking pictures of everything which does annoy the missus, but I then remind her of the alternative – me hammering 5 Peroni’s before lunch and vomiting in her Gucci handbag on a connecting flight.

Get up at the crack and hit the bell towers

Our feet never touched the ground in ten days. The missus loves a bell tower and we did about 8 in as many days. You might not be vacationing in bell tower country, but make the effort to see as much of the country/city you’re visiting as possible.

If you’re going on a beach holiday and envisage yourself being horizontal for 7 days, then basically you’re screwed. That’s your thing, fine. But you’re screwed. You might come back with a nice tan, but you’ll also bring back an extra half a stone in weight and a pickled liver.

Bell tower montepulciano

non alcoholic menu alcohol

Safe sex on the beach

I’m made up I took this picture. It’s a hackneyed reason but I’ll be honest, I need to pack for Naples and get going.

But, whilst we were away we drank nothing but non-alcoholic cocktails and we couldn’t tell the difference.

Maybe we were actually just drinking alcoholic cocktails, who knows. Any decent bar worth its salt will have a menu like this and you get to play around with different ones, much like you would have done if you were boozing.

Right that’s it from me. Hope there was something here for you. Have you got any tips of your own for ways of avoiding alcohol on holidays? Be keen to hear from you in the comment bar below. Click on any picture to follow me on Pinterest.


woman free open road

Awesome way to hitch a lift


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